Tidy Bench Club Application No 326

[Guest]

Sir.
My submission for the inclusion in the temporary membership section of the above club.
Certified copies of these photos have been posted to you.


Dzhon Racisjy
Bed 6
Ward 9.

[Neil Merryweather]

good luck sustaining that , John!
very impressive

[Guest]

Good boy John - did you do that by yourself or did matron help?

[Jim R]

Dear Mr Racisjy
When we received your application (ref no 326) we were both pleased and also rather suspicious. Pleased because your photos clearly show that effort has been put in to reach the high standards membership demands. However there was also a feeling of unease in that this is the latest of a string of applications. All the previous applications showed various levels of order and tidiness and yet the improvements were not sustained and you lapsed quickly back into your old ways of chaos and disorder.
In view of the above reservations the committee have decided on the following -
- please submit photos of your bench on a monthly basis. These photos should be dated and show the bench from various angles
- please also submit a statement from matron to the effect that your fire raising tendancies are under control and that the current medication is effective.
- a phychiatric report that your obsession with the colour green is unlikely to become a danger to those around you.
- you are willing to allow us to interview you in order to satisfy the committee that your interest in all things Russian is not a threat to national security. A member of M15 will be in attendance at that interview
Membership at this time is therefore denied although we have high hopes for the future.
Yours
Sir Marmeduke Ponsonby Ffyfe - TBC membership secretary

Please also ensure that you put a postage stamp on future correspondence as the TBC is not willing to continure to pay your postage costs.

[Guest]

Hi this is my submission for temporary membership of the bench tidy club.

Certified photos .

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Thank you and good night.

Pete.

[Steve Jones]

Dear Mr Racisjy
When we received your application (ref no 326) we were both pleased and also rather suspicious. Pleased because your photos clearly show that effort has been put in to reach the high standards membership demands. However there was also a feeling of unease in that this is the latest of a string of applications. All the previous applications showed various levels of order and tidiness and yet the improvements were not sustained and you lapsed quickly back into your old ways of chaos and disorder.
In view of the above reservations the committee have decided on the following -
- please submit photos of your bench on a monthly basis. These photos should be dated and show the bench from various angles
- please also submit a statement from matron to the effect that your fire raising tendancies are under control and that the current medication is effective.
- a phychiatric report that your obsession with the colour green is unlikely to become a danger to those around you.
- you are willing to allow us to interview you in order to satisfy the committee that your interest in all things Russian is not a threat to national security. A member of M15 will be in attendance at that interview
Membership at this time is therefore denied although we have high hopes for the future.
Yours
Sir Marmeduke Ponsonby Ffyfe - TBC membership secretary

Please also ensure that you put a postage stamp on future correspondence as the TBC is not willing to continure to pay your postage costs.

A stunning reply Jim. I now have my lunch time cuppa all down my front LOL

[Bortig the Viking]

Here's my desk for analysis, yes I do like green.

[Guest]

Rejected, yet again.:cold-sweat::cold-sweat::cold-sweat::cold-sweat::cold-sweat::disappointed::fearful: Damn and blast.


Mrs R thinks we are all mad ! I replied yes we are, but some more than others.
Seeing Matron during the week , she's currently on her way back from Pete Lows.

A stunning reply Jim. I now have my lunch time cuppa all down my front LOL

Oh dear what a shame:flushed::surprised::smiling3::smiling3::smil ing3::tongue-out3: Steve.

[Jim R]

In this insane world it help to be mad :tongue-out3:

Pete - whilst that is indeed a tidy bench we, at the TBC, feel you just may have misunderstood the clubs aims.
Mark - you're in. Just the kind of organised bench we at the TBC welcome. You membership certificate will be forwarded on receipt of the membership fee which currently stands at £99.99. Cheques payable to Sir M P Ffyfe, c/o The Big and Bouncy Club, Soho, London.

[Dave Ward]

My late Boss always used to say that ' a tidy desk showed that you didn't have enough work to do ' , consequently he never bothered me! :smiling3:
How do you find anything if it's tidy? Tidy means you've put it all away, into places you immediately forget. I work on the principle that 'it's on the desk, all you have to do is spot it' Not anarchy, but probably the closest I will ever come to that way of thinking!
Dave

[Guest]

Dear Sir.
Nowhere in your rules and regulations does it specify work bench. I just think you're one of these jobsworth people overly picky, as for Mr Race he has gone to a lot of trouble and time not to mention the cost. I know for a fact it took 15 boy scouts 12 1/2 hours at 2/6p an hour
to swap every corner.
Pete.

[boatman]

I know for a fact I will never get in so no good me applyin:cold-sweat::cold-sweat::cold-sweat::cold-sweat::smiling2::smiling2::smiling2: an Jim your reply letter to
John R had me in stiches were you ever a lawyer in the past live ? its good to be mad ain't it
chris

[Fernando N]

Nice one Mr. Race, love those magnetic holders for the tools on the wall:astonished:.

Too bad my bench is in lieu with Mr. Wards most of the year so no application from me Mr. R:upside:...

[Bortig the Viking]

All the tools are visible, there's nothing in the draws except dreams. Nah not really but I group similar items together so that I remember where they came from, as long as my memory lasts. Now where's that glue bottle, who are you where am I, I give up .....

[Ian M]

Well Why not:

As tidy as it's ever going to be. I even emptied the ash tray!
Really need to make a tool holder some day......The little one ran out of places way to quick. lol.