discussion Perfect partener

[Guest]

I love my missus but what if I said I hated my life and wished I was dead. As a schoolboy I was bullied mercilessly, so what you may say, we all get or got bullied at school, well that depends on how much, I was bullied to the extent I wished I was dead. And actually tried.Well I think there comes a point where we all make a choice, mine was to stand up, so I beat the s@@@ out of the gang leader. After that point I was everyone's friend, I so wish instead of leaving it to my last year of school I had done it earlier. My point being why am I here I should be dead. You hear of youngsters killing themselves because of bullying, well I could have been one of them but I was lucky, the straw snapped, but what about the ones it doesn't snap for. Stand up for yourself, no one else will. One day you may find someone who loves you for who you are. Grab that person and hold on they are all you need, or will ever want.

 

[Guest]

You and me both tbh mate

I do still have these feelings from time to time, quite recently if i'm honest....

34 and still not found anyone.....

 

[Lee W]

I was bullied at school and when I first joined the Navy. It soon stopped when I stood up to them.

As for finding a girl, not blowing my own trumpet, I didn't really have a problem.

Go out have fun, never go out looking for a woman...It doesn't happen!!!...It will when you least expect it.

You get one chance in life, so live it, single or with someone.

Peace and respect...no I'm not a tree hugging gangsta!

Lee

 

[Alan 45]

The thing is today parents can't tell the difference from standing up for yourself and fighting , many of these kids today are Molly coddled and they are told your a bigger person if you walk away but that just makes the bullies braver , if you don't hit back once in a while it will get worse and that's why kids feel there is no option but to put an end to it once and for all , in part society is to blame because parents don't understand how tough it is is schools and fill their kids with nonsense , just because you stand up for yourself does not mean your a bully or a thug but that's the problem parents and schools don't understand.

 

[Lee W]

Just to top off my 2 pence worth, I'm 42 next month and I've never had a fight, I've either walked away or talked the situation down.

Yes I've hit someone...twice, sat them down and told them to leave me alone, I wouldn't class that as a fight! I've been hit, that was in a club, wrong place, wrong time.

Alan, I will say bullies aren't braver if you walk away, they just feel belittled and embarrassed, they look the stupid ones.

Lee

 

[Alan 45]

I don't think someone is week for walking away but it does depend on the area you live in , I lived in rough areas most of my life but was never bullied or have I been a bully or thought of myself as tough, as a kid if you walked away you would of got beaten up because you were seen as week and you was the perfect target , me on the other hand I sttod up for myself and never backed down so the bullies moved to easier prey , rules of the school yard I suppose , why pick on someone who will hit you back while there are people who won't

 

[Guest]

How life changes when you are older. I was bullied at school aswell, never to the extent that I wished I was dead but I always regret not standing up for myself. Now that i'm older i'm very pleasant and polite but i won't take s**t from anyone. With kids aswell it's all good and well saying turn the other cheek but kids can be brutal. I tell my kids (4 and 6) never to bully anyone and never hit anyone BUT if anyone hits them first i've told them make sure they hit them back so they'll think twice before trying it again.

 

[eddiesolo]

Never bullied at school, had a couple of fisty-cuffs but nothing major. I once got into a big fight in my early twenties defending my wife to be, a lad started calling her rather rude names so I stepped in, it calmed down but he started again when I saw him on his own walking home from work. I told him to leave it, he just went on and on so I clobbered him, he came at me so I clobbered him again and stuck my steel toe caps in to make sure he stayed down. Wasn't proud of the moment but he never bothered me or my wife again. I would rather talk my way out of any trouble, fighting really is a mugs game, found out by being scarred with a knife in a pub, the lad who did it got a bottle for his trouble, but I should have walked away. I think there are times when standing up for yourself is warranted just make sure you are not outnumbered or backed into a corner, keep your eyes and ears open.

Si

 

[Guest]

I found the one and only time I fought back changed my life forever (because I won) I was bullied all my school life, it got to the stage if someone near me put their hand up to answer a question say, or to scratch their head I would duck, it would not have been as bad if it was just one kid but it was 8 they made my life hell I am sure I would have left school with a lot better grades than I did. It also affected my mums life she has always felt guilty it was her pills I used and that it had got that bad without her noticing. Anyway after the fight I became a different person, alot more confident to the point I would step in if I saw someone being bullied and I think it was because I felt so confident they could see I would stick up for myself and the person being bullied they would back off. As I said I never had another fight but also never got bullied again, I actually gained a reputation as being a hard nut, I wasn't but made sure I lived up to it, so much so, that people were actually scared of me, I didn't like that so calmed it down a bit, but from that experience I have not and will not take s@@@ from anyone. I would always advise stand up to bullies (when they are on their own never when more than one of them preset) always pick the leader/biggest one and do it at the earliest point you can, or like me you will waste your school years and your life will be hell. Don't tell the teachers they can't stop it, will only make it worse. The only person who can stop a bully is the person being bullied. Bullies are cowards it's why they never do it on thier own. I wish with all my heart I could go back to the first time I was bullied it would have stopped then. Walking away or my friends ploy of pretending to cry won't stop it standing up to them will. I'm not saying every time it should end in a fight (sometimes as in my case it's unavoidable)but standing up to them really is the only way. As Alan said they are cowards at heart and will move on to easier pray.

I feel so much better for getting all that off my chest this is not only the friendliest forum on the net but the most therapeutic as well.

 

[Ian M]

I think that most people at some time in their life have had to stand up for themselves or another that can't. Been there got the t-shirt.

School and a surname like mine is asking for it ...

I dealt with it the quick way. The biggest meanest of the bunch was put down on is back and I had peace for the most of the time.

Ian M

 

[Guest]

Just as I said that really is the only way I just wish it hadn't taken the years it did for me to find out.