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Tidy, tidy, tidy 😀

Dear Geoff
The local representative of the Tidy Bench Club (UK) has forwarded the photograph of your spray booth bench to me. I must confess to being most impressed and feel certain that such dedication to order and neatness makes you an ideal candidate for membership of this exclusive club. Membership includes many benefits for the discerning modeller. The club magazine "TIP TOP TIDY" will be sent out twice a year. Members receive a 10% discount for the adult periodical "BIG AND BOUNCY" and members can expect preferential service at Madam Trixiebelle's massage parlour.
To take advantage of this very special offer please send a cheque for £187.13 to me -

Major Hamish MacSporran retired
C/O FiFi Lamour
72 Piddle Lane
Soho
 
Thread owner
Dear Geoff
The local representative of the Tidy Bench Club (UK) has forwarded the photograph of your spray booth bench to me. I must confess to being most impressed and feel certain that such dedication to order and neatness makes you an ideal candidate for membership of this exclusive club. Membership includes many benefits for the discerning modeller. The club magazine "TIP TOP TIDY" will be sent out twice a year. Members receive a 10% discount for the adult periodical "BIG AND BOUNCY" and members can expect preferential service at Madam Trixiebelle's massage parlour.
To take advantage of this very special offer please send a cheque for £187.13 to me -

Major Hamish MacSporran retired
C/O FiFi Lamour
72 Piddle Lane
Soho

Dear Major Macsporran,

Thank you for your generous offer which I will unfortunately have to decline.
While the club magazine sounds like a riveting read I’m afraid the rest of the “benefits” may not go down well with swmbo.
I’m afraid my work bench may not look so tidy after she has finished flaying me alive across it should I indulge in the full club activities.
I trust you will understand and I wish you well with your club.

Yours sincerely etc.
 
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